When I was a child, I had a great imagination and apparently it was good enough to fool my parents. Often, when I told something about my day, they asked me: “ Is that the truth or your imagination?”
What is the difference?
Is it important to know?
Truth seems to be something that is really very non-definable and elusive. In the dictionary, truth is defined as fact, reality and honesty. Hmmm
I remember once having a discussion with my 4 siblings about our parents and upbringing, and it was amazing how varied our recollections and interpretations were from each other. We can agree on dates and events, but the rest is really our own experience. Where would we find the truth in that?
From the time we are born, we become socialized into our families, friends and society. We learn rules, attempt to discern facts from fiction and enter into unconscious agreements of what is real and what is honest. This does not mean we know what the truth is and are able to share it.
One of the best examples for me is asking another person: “ How are you?” Usually the answer comes out automatically and is mostly along the lines of:” Good. Awesome. Fine.”
Is that the truth?
If I ask the same question again, usually there is a bit of hesitation, a bit of time spent checking in and now the answer may be something like: “ Actually, I feel a bit tired today. I did not sleep very well.”
Ah, this feels a little more like the truth.
So, I ask again: “ How are you?”
This time, there is a longer pause, more time spent checking internally what is going on and the answer may be:” They are laying people off at work and I am worried that I will be one of them.“
And I can keep asking, allowing the other person to reflect and connect with more truths about what is going on for them.
Truth is personal. It reflects our beliefs, values and our unique way of seeing the world and our place in it.
Sometimes, when we are under stress, we blurt out something that in the moment feels like the truth: “ You always…” “ You never…”You are so…”.
This is a way of trying to release too much pressure from inside ourselves. When we feel overwhelmed and afraid, we get triggered and respond without thinking. It is usually faulting another for what is going on with ourselves, resulting in blaming, diminishing and hurtful statements. This is not the truth!
For me, truth comes from an inner place of contemplation and groundedness. I cannot feel hurried or pressured. I have to create a sense of inner spaciousness for a personal truth to arise and be in listening mode to capture it. I have to feel a certain level of safety to share it.
When I connect with a truth, it affects my heart, no matter if it is painful or good news. It changes my energetic pattern, and if I am talking with another, it will also affect their heart. We all know intuitively when we connect with a truth.
A truth shared from the heart is kind, expansive and does not need any justification.
It just is.