Ready to Face It?

Are you a good student of spirituality?

By that I mean:

Are you working on staying open when stuff happens that you don’t like?

So often I come across some writings in spiritual circles that encourage me to stay open, no matter what.

Easier said than done, do you agree?

When something happens to you that you don’t like or want or, in other words, you have resistance to, your body naturally contracts in the process, and you may feel some emotions like anger, upset, shame or guilt. These are indicators that something in you has become reactive.

The reactivity can be to an old pattern or habit, a particular point of view: i.e. I am right and you are wrong or a fear of being seen in a particular way, bringing up all the shadows in the overarching categories of “I am not lovable, valuable, worthy or important”.

There are LOTS of reasons for resistance and contracting.

And… sometimes you clearly notice the contractions and at other times they just float by.

When you don’t notice this resistance, life force contracts, you more easily get overwhelmed, tired and tend to take on a more negative perspective of the world. Not so desirable.

When you do notice your resistance, it becomes a beautiful opportunity to integrate a point of view, to move into more alignment between the inner and outer you. The outcome is more energy, more love, joy and expansiveness in life.

And even so that is a desirable outcome, you may naturally shy away from consciously integrating a resistance. There may be fear of what you might have to confront, and nobody likes to hang out in potential emotional pain and discomfort.

However, the only way to integration is to notice, to allow, to stay with it until the edges soften, the tissues relax, the heart re-opens and clarity arises.

In my view that is what is meant by “staying open”: not avoiding, running away or deferring to later.

Staying open means to recognize that you are in resistance and feeling it, looking at it, staying with it until a shift occurs. Sometimes you can do that on your own, other times it is easier to be with someone who can hold a non-judgmental space for you to allow the transformation to occur.

Once you have integrated a point of view, it does not trigger you anymore. You can stay open naturally, without efforting or fear. Most of the time you won’t even notice that openness. It just seems natural and allows you to feel more energized and present day-to-day.

So, next time you get triggered by someone or something in your life and you notice the contraction, remember that you have a choice: avoid and keep suffering or face the feelings for a better life experience overall.

What’s it for you?


Let me know in your comments below what you are discovering.

If you find some challenges in creating this change in perspective for yourself, let’s have a conversation and explore how I can support you in making this happen.

Amara’s Musings: Creating Spaciousness - Inside and Out

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